Monday, June 29, 2015

Day 24

Dear Uterus--

My third pregnancy was supposed to be my own pregnancy, but then a surrogacy sort of fell into out laps, then out of our laps, then a match failed, and then we found this last couple.

Originally though, our plan was us, someone else, us, someone else, and then an altruistic (non-paid) surrogacy for a friend or family member.

Part of me is a little sad that I did't go with the original plan--- a very small part.

For us, right now, it's better that we do only have the one child.

 I also have to be thankful I think that it was a surrogacy.

I wanted a birth center birth for our next baby. I wanted a midwife. I wanted to be able to go to 43 weeks if the baby was healthy because I didn't want to be on a time restraint.

I have to be thankful that it was a surrogate pregnancy because I had to deliver at a hospital. I have to be thankful because I was pushed into delivering in a set time-frame.

I was verging on percreta (the placenta going through the uterus and into nearby organs-- this can be deadly just in itself). I would have delivered vaginally and I would have thought the extra bleeding was normal-- I bled more in my vaginal than in my first c-section.

I hate the circumstances--- but I have to be grateful for parts of them.

-Michelle

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